If you’ve ever left a social interaction and immediately started replaying everything you said — wondering if you sounded awkward, annoying, or unlikeable — you’re not alone.
For many people, this cycle of overthinking conversations and feeling like others secretly don’t like you is a core feature of social anxiety. And while it can feel exhausting, confusing, and isolating, there are real reasons your nervous system does this — and real ways to heal it.
At Metta Holistic Therapy, we work with many clients across West Virginia who struggle with social anxiety, self-doubt, people‑pleasing, and the constant fear of being judged. This blog will help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface — and how therapy can help.
What Is Social Anxiety?
Social anxiety isn’t just shyness.
It’s a nervous system response rooted in fear of rejection, criticism, or being seen negatively by others. People with social anxiety often:
- Replay conversations over and over
- Analyze facial expressions, tone, or body language
- Assume they said something wrong
- Feel embarrassed long after an interaction ends
- Worry others are judging or disliking them
- Avoid social situations or feel drained afterward
Even positive interactions can trigger overthinking.
Why You Overthink What You Said
Overthinking isn’t a personality flaw — it’s a protective strategy.
Your brain is trying to answer one question:
“Did I do something that could lead to rejection?”
If you grew up in an environment where:
- Love felt conditional
- You were criticized or emotionally invalidated
- You had to stay alert to others’ moods
- Mistakes led to shame or punishment
Your nervous system learned that social safety = survival.
So now, your mind scans for danger after the interaction — replaying everything to prevent future harm.
“What If They Don’t Like Me?” – The Core Fear
Many people with social anxiety aren’t actually afraid of people.
They’re afraid of:
- Being rejected
- Being misunderstood
- Being seen as “too much” or “not enough”
- Being excluded
- Being abandoned
This often shows up as the belief:
“If they really knew me, they wouldn’t like me.”
That belief isn’t random — it’s usually rooted in early relational wounds, not present‑day reality.
How Trauma and Attachment Play a Role
Social anxiety is often linked to:
- Childhood emotional neglect
- Narcissistic or emotionally unpredictable caregivers
- Bullying or social rejection
- Relational trauma
- People‑pleasing and fawning responses
When connection once felt unsafe, your body learned to stay on high alert around others.
That’s why logic alone doesn’t stop the overthinking.
This isn’t a thinking problem — it’s a nervous system pattern.
Why Reassurance Doesn’t Stick
You might logically know:
- “They probably didn’t mean anything by that.”
- “I’m overthinking.”
- “No one said I did anything wrong.”
Yet your body still feels anxious.
That’s because social anxiety lives below conscious thought — in the autonomic nervous system.
This is why holistic, trauma‑informed therapy is so effective.
How Therapy Can Help Social Anxiety
At Metta Holistic Therapy, we don’t just talk about your anxiety — we help your body learn safety.
Therapy for social anxiety may include:
- Somatic experiencing to regulate the nervous system
- IFS (Internal Family Systems) to heal inner critical or fearful parts
- Mindfulness‑based approaches to reduce rumination
- Attachment‑focused work to rebuild self‑trust
- EMDR to process social or relational trauma
Instead of asking:
“What’s wrong with me?”
We ask:
“What did your nervous system learn – and how do we update it?”
Signs Your Social Anxiety Is Ready to Heal
You might benefit from therapy if you:
- Feel exhausted after social interactions
- Avoid situations you actually want to enjoy
- Constantly second‑guess yourself
- Struggle with self‑confidence
- Feel hyper‑aware of others’ reactions
- Want deeper, safer connections
You don’t need to feel this way forever.
Therapy for Social Anxiety in West Virginia
If you’re looking for therapy for social anxiety in West Virginia, Metta Holistic Therapy offers trauma‑informed, compassionate support for adults who are tired of overthinking and self‑doubt.
We help you:
- Feel more grounded around others
- Trust yourself socially
- Quiet the inner critic
- Build authentic confidence
- Experience connection without constant fear
You’re Not Too Much – You’re Protecting Yourself
Social anxiety doesn’t mean you’re broken.
It means your nervous system learned to protect you.
With the right support, you can learn to feel safe being yourself — without replaying every word.
Ready to Take the Next Step?
If this resonates, therapy can help.
📍 Serving adults across West Virginia
💛 Learn more or schedule a consultation at Metta Holistic Therapy
You deserve ease, connection, and peace – not constant self‑doubt.
Metta Holistic Therapy 